"During President Obama's visit to an elementary school
yesterday, one little boy actually asked him if he ever fought in the Civil
War. Obama told the boy he did not, but he re-enacts it with Congress all the
time." –Jimmy Fallon
"A recent report says the majority of Americans cannot
name the three branches of government — Judicial, Executive, and Legislative.
To make it easier, the government is renaming those branches Kim, Khloe, and
Kourtney." –Conan O'Brien
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