"These brothers killed a young policeman, carjacked an
SUV, ending with a high-speed chase and a firefight in which Tamerlan was
mortally wounded, ending his life as all Islamic terrorists dream: at Beth
Israel Hospital." –Stephen Colbert on the Boston Marathon bombers
"I mean, at the end of this man's presidency, even as my
fellow conservatives were abandoning George Bush like rats on a sinking ship on
a crash course with Cat Island, I remained faithful, and I'm sure he knows that
from the warrantless wiretaps he authorized." –Stephen Colbert
"The Bush Presidential Library is beautiful, and they have
a huge section devoted to weapons of mass destruction, but nobody can find
it." –David Letterman
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