Yes, William and Kate, we'll definitely set up a play date (My work here is done)

July 2013

"There's a new Anthony Weiner scandal. Weiner is running for mayor of New York City. He confirmed yesterday that some new sexually explicit messages have been leaked. He sent them to a woman on Facebook using the code name 'Carlos Danger.' Which is still easier to believe than that other name: Mayor Weiner." –Jimmy Fallon

"It was revealed that Anthony Weiner sent nude pictures of himself to this woman using a 'Carlos Danger' Yahoo email address. His wife was shocked. She said, 'You still use Yahoo?'" –Jimmy Fallon

"The past 24 hours have been so exciting for my wife and I, and we haven't had a chance to respond to everyone's calls and messages, but let me just say, 'Yes, William and Kate, we'll definitely set up a play date.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Everybody is still talking about the other baby, the royal baby. In fact, I saw that President Obama released a statement congratulating Prince William and Kate Middleton on the birth of their son. Then he said, 'And whatever you do – hang on to that birth certificate.'" –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

How do we get this kid to move to Detroit? (Those things come in handy)

July 2013

"At the press conference today, Anthony Weiner’s wife said she will stand by her husband. Especially when he goes on the computer." –Conan O'Brien

"The royal baby has been born. The royal baby was officially welcomed with a 62-gun salute. Because if there's one thing babies love, it's the sound of repeated artillery fire." –Conan O'Brien

"Experts are predicting that the royal baby could pump $380 million into the British economy. So the question is: How do we get this kid to move to Detroit?" –Conan O'Brien

"President Obama has issued a statement about the royal baby. He told him to hang on to the birth certificate. Those things come in handy." –Conan O'Brien

"The royal baby is set to inherit $1 billion. In fact, he's so rich that he's already dating a girl half his age." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Don't You Dare Tell Me How To Freedom (I will be king, Father)

July 2013

"Anthony Weiner released a statement today saying this behavior is behind me. Then he added, if you want to see more of what's behind me, I'll text you a photograph." –Craig Ferguson

"Today we got our first look at the royal baby. The crowd outside the hospital was very respectful. You could actually hear the baby say, 'Fetch me some milk' and 'I will be king, Father.'" –Craig Ferguson

"Mayoral candidate Anthony Wiener had more photographs released from his sexting scandal. New Yorkers were so shocked that Eliot Spitzer fell off his hooker." –Craig Ferguson

"New Yorkers were so shocked that the thing on Trump's head fainted." –Craig Ferguson

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Biden Thinks He's LBJ, FDR As Presidency COLLAPSES

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Jimmy Dore: Russell Brand "Canceled" For Telling Truth About RussiaGate & Hillary!

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Arizona Dems Vote NO CONFIDENCE In CENSURE Of Kyrsten Sinema

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

America’s already scheduled a plague Armageddon (Dunder Mifflin’s Scranton branch)

September 2021

“There is a potential for a government shutdown looming. It would be what one economist called ‘financial Armageddon.’ That’s bad news and even worse timing, because America’s already scheduled a plague Armageddon, a climate Armageddon and a democracy Armageddon.” — Stephen Colbert

“Yes, for one magical vote a year, senators leave the mortal world behind and enter an enchanted land of reconciliation. [singing to the tune of ‘Pure Imagination’ from ‘Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory’] Come with me, and you’ll be / In a world of reconciliation / It’s our sole remedy / Except for pure intoxication.” —Stephen Colbert

“Reconciliation is a phantasmagorical place of legislative wonder, where anything can happen. Who knows — maybe even something!” —Stephen Colbert

“Congress — that’s the only workplace less productive than Dunder Mifflin’s Scranton branch.” —Trevor Noah

“Republicans aren’t making it any easier, of course. They’ve already deployed their go-to weapon that always stops the Democrats from getting things done: other Democrats.” —James Corden

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”