I love cottage cheese that's why I want to try other dwelling cheese's too. I want to try studio apartment cheese or maybe igloo cheese or if I'm feeling adventurous, mobile home cheese. —Mitch Hedberg
I wish they made fajita Cologne because that stuff smells good. —Mitch Hedberg
When I was a boy I laid in my twin sized bed and wonder where my brother was. —Mitch Hedberg
I like to sleep, but I hate to dream because dreaming takes energy. It takes work. Sleeping is supposed to be relaxing. I lay down on a bed it feels great, but the next thing you know I have to build a go-kart with my ex landlord. —Mitch Hedberg
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
