Equivalent Human Age: 42 (worst September meltdown)

September 2011

"President Obama's hometown newspaper, the Chicago Tribune has called on Obama not to run for re-election. He has to run. He knows there are no other jobs out there." –Jay Leno

"The Solyndra executives are scheduled to testify before Congress, and they're expected to take the 5th. Why not take the 5th? They've already taken $535 million." –Jay Leno

"Bad day for the stock market. It's down nearly 400 points. They're calling it the worst September meltdown since the Red Sox." –Jay Leno

"There was another big Republican debate tonight in Orlando, Fla. This one was sponsored by Google, which is tricky for Rick Perry because he's a yahoo." –Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Unless it's two chicks (17 wives)

"The chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff recently upset gay activists because he said, 'a homosexual act between two individuals is immoral.' Then the chairman added, 'Unless it's two chicks.'" --Conan O'Brien

"The movie '300' is a setting box office records, but there is a controversy. The country of Iran is reportedly angry over the depiction of the Persian Empire in the movie '300'. Not only that, the Syrian government's upset that Eddie Murphy didn't win an Oscar for 'Dreamgirls.'" --Conan O'Brien

"According to the Chicago Tribune, Senator Obama's great-great-great-great-grandfather and great-great-great-great-grandmother may have owned slaves. It's damage control time. I believe the only way for Barack Obama to get in front of this story is to do the right thing -- the thing so many black leaders are unwilling to do -- apologize for slavery." --Stephen Colbert

"Mitt Romney, who is a Mormon, is reeling from reports that his great-grandfather had fives wives and at least one of his great-great-grandfathers had twelve. That poor bastard had to register at Crate and Barrel 12 times. And that's back when all they sold were crates and barrels. The word 'polygamy', of course, comes from the Greek 'poly' meaning multiple and 'gamy' meaning reasons not to vote for Mitt Romney." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

That shows you how unpopular this administration is (he won't shake hands with the Navy's Rear Admiral)

"The Bush administration is still taking a lot of heat for firing eight U.S. attorneys. That shows you how unpopular this administration is -- when the people are siding with the lawyers." --Jay Leno

"The chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Peter Pace, told the Chicago Tribune he considers homosexual acts to be immoral. In fact, he feels so strongly about this issue that he won't shake hands with the Navy's Rear Admiral." --Jay Leno

"President Bush is safely back from his tour of Latin America. He said it really opened up his eyes. He said, 'We thought we had a lot of illegal immigrants here, they're all over the place down there.'" --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”