And I'm thinking, why didn't we get a president like that instead of George W. Bush? (I mean, luckily something like that couldn't happen today)

"According to reports, Fidel Castro is alert and being briefed. And I'm thinking, why didn't we get a president like that instead of George W. Bush?" --David Letterman

"People say Hillary Clinton has a brand new diamond ring, an enormous diamond ring. The last time anybody saw a rock that big, it was going through a window at the Danish embassy." --David Letterman

"Today is a historic day. On this day in 1804 Vice President Aaron Burr shot Alexander Hamilton. A vice president shooting a guy? I mean, luckily something like that couldn't happen today." --David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”