Say Bob, is Barack Obama black? I don't know. Ask Phil, he follows politics (the p---- card)

"How many saw the Republican debate last night? Wow!  Mitt Romney last night in Florida played the p---- card against the Clintons. It's only January and he's not even the candidate. He said the idea of Bill Clinton back in the White House with nothing to do. Now that is a man who wants to be president. He is telling the Republican base, 'You know what? These other posers up here with me, they may have forgotten about the sauce on the blue dress, but I, Ward Cleaver, have not. I am Mitt Romney, Mormon android and I will say whatever you program me to say. I will run on a platform of stopping illegal immigrants from having sex with Bill Clinton until the surge has succeeded.'" --Bill Maher

"On the Democratic side, that's where the real soap opera is. Not that the Clintons always bring the drama. The pundits are now saying that Bill Clinton is down there in South Carolina playing the bad cop, while the two strippers are dressed up as nurses. No, no. He's playing the bad cop because apparently the pundits say he has injected race into the campaign to let people know that Obama is the black candidate. You mean before that people hadn't noticed? Say Bob, is Barack Obama black? I don't know. Ask Phil, he follows politics." --Bill Maher