"President Obama said 'No single individual built America on their own.' When she heard that, Sarah Palin was like, 'Hello? Paul Bunyan?'" –Jimmy Fallon
"House Speaker John Boehner said that President Obama's jobs plan merits consideration. Then he was like, 'In fact, I'll do it right now. OK, I hate it.'" –Jimmy Fallon
"Michele Bachmann is for people who find Sarah Palin too intellectual. She is pure. She is always completely fact-free. She said the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly until they got rid of slavery. So from now on Thomas Jefferson’s slaves will be known as friends with benefits." –Bill Maher, on Jay Leno
John Hulse photography
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