the German army is now doing most of its recruiting in New Jersey (He's more evil than I thought)

Saddam Hussein's guards, the people who are guarding him in prison, have talked. They've given these interviews with GQ magazine, the magazine for dictators on the go. According to the soldiers who were guarding Saddam Hussein, Saddam likes having Raisin Bran for breakfast but he hates Fruit Loops. After hearing this President Bush said, “He hates fruit loops? He's more evil than I thought.” --Conan O’Brien 6/21/2005

It was reported that during their recent trip to Paris, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes ran up a thirty thousand dollar hotel bill. Cruz was furious and told Holmes, “This is coming out of what I pay you.” --Conan O’Brien 6/21/2005

A court in Germany has ruled that soldiers in the German army should be allowed to keep their mullets and ponytails. In a related story the German army is now doing most of its recruiting in New Jersey. --Conan O’Brien 6/21/2005

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”  

and yet something still doesn't smell right (Days of Thunder burrito)

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes wedding is tomorrow and will feature six thousand scented candles. That's right six thousand scented candles and yet something still doesn't smell right. --Conan O’Brien 11/17/2004

The Italian town where Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are getting married has started naming entrees in their honor. Including a Vanilla Sky pasta and a Last Samurai filet. But even the chef says to stay away from the Days of Thunder burrito. --Conan O’Brien 11/17/2004

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”