That's why it's a million pages long (I'm going as Congress)

"Arnold Schwarzenegger's book is out today. Arnold's book reveals all the secrets he kept from his wife. That's why it's a million pages long." –Craig Ferguson

"A new survey says one in three adults will be dressing up for Halloween. As for me, I'm not going to do anything. I'm going as Congress." –Craig Ferguson

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”