“The official motto for this year’s Olympics is ‘United by Emotion.’ Yeah, and the unofficial motto is, ‘As of right now, we’re still doing this.’” —Jimmy Fallon
“And, meanwhile, as if all the Covid concerns around the Games aren’t bad enough, a bear was spotted inside the softball stadium and is still on the loose. What an Olympics this is going to be. I mean, between the bears and getting a disease, it’s like we sent our athletes to a game of ‘Oregon Trail.’ It’s not a good situation. Apparently, the bear got really agitated after officials made him sleep on a cardboard bed.” —Jimmy Fallon
“There’s a lot of misinformation out there, so I thought it would be helpful to break down what’s fact and what’s fiction about this year’s Games. For example: Simone Biles may attempt a Yurchenko double pike vault and half-on with two twists. Fiction: that’s her Starbucks order.” —Jimmy Fallon
“Next up, fact: karate, skateboarding, sport climbing and surfing are making their Olympic debut. Fiction: Frisbee golf is next, bruh.” —Jimmy Fallon
“And finally, fact: the Games will have no spectators. Fiction: when they heard, badminton players were like, ‘Wait, you can have spectators?’ That’s fiction, they know that.” —Jimmy Fallon
“We’re not allowed to show Olympic footage, because it airs on NBC and that means ABC would probably have to pay for it. And they just brought me back for another season of ‘Black-ish,’ so they’re kind of broke-ish.” — Anthony Anderson, guest host of “Jimmy Kimmel Live”
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night
of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
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