All the other cardinals are buying him shots at the Vatican Applebee's (They're going to fight it out with holy relics)

February 2013

"We are 24 hours away from massive across-the-board budget cuts. If the cuts go into effect, major airports could face delays up to 90 minutes – or as JetBlue calls it, an on-time departure." –Conan O'Brien

"These automatic budget cuts are serious. It could negatively affect water and sewage services. In other words, all of America is about to embark on a Carnival Cruise." –Conan O'Brien

"Today was Pope Benedict's last day at work. Don't be sad. All the other cardinals are buying him shots at the Vatican Applebee's." –Conan O'Brien

"The Pope spoke to 100 cardinals and said, 'Among you is the future Pope.' And then he said, 'Now enter The Octagon.' They're going to fight it out with holy relics." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”