It's almost as if it works or something (Not a funny gift, an actual gag)

"You know, if I wanted somebody halfheartedly patting my groin without eye contact, I'd get married." –Seth Meyers, on airport security

"At the dedication of his Presidential Library, George W. Bush said it's long been his dream to build a building for teenagers to drink behind." –Seth Meyers

"President Obama has a tough decision to make this week. Which turkey does he pardon — the Thanksgiving one or Charlie Rangel?" –Jay Leno

"Happy birthday to Vice President Joe Biden. President Obama got him a gag gift. Not a funny gift, an actual gag." –Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”