If a guy named Reese comes by and says let me have it, you better hand it over (world without humans)

I hate sandwiches at New York delis. There’s too much meat on the sandwich. It's like a cow with a cracker on either side. They asked me what I would like. I said, “a pastrami sandwich, a loaf of bread, and some other people.” I order a club sandwich all the time and I'm not even a member. Man, I don't know how I get away with it. --Mitch Hedberg

I get the Reese's candy bar. You know Reese's? If you read that name Reese's there’s an apostrophe in there. That candy bar is his, man. I didn't know that. The next time you’re eating a Reese's candy bar and a guy named Reese comes by and says let me have it, you better hand it over. --Mitch Hedberg

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”