"California officials want to contain a measles outbreak
that originated in Disneyland last month. They are in luck because everyone who
is exposed to it is still in line at Space Mountain." –Conan O'Brien
"Deflate-gate isn't the only thing in Boston now. Boston
is the city chosen to vie for the Summer Olympics in 2024. Mayor Walsh is
prohibiting city employees from making negative comments about the games or the
process. That seems unnecessary. If people from Boston are known for anything,
it's for keeping their opinions to themselves, right?" –Jimmy Kimmel
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