In fact, oil companies today had to lay off 15 senators (We're happy to be landing ahead of schedule)

"Congress has approved some version of this fiscal cliff bill thing. Well, taxes are going up, and now, they're looking to make cuts just about everywhere. In fact, oil companies today had to lay off 15 senators." –Jay Leno

"Jon Huntsman finished third and he said he's happy with the momentum he gained this week. You know it's got to be fun being a politician. You can spin everything. Your plane is crashing and you're saying, 'We're happy to be landing ahead of schedule.'" –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”