The most productive thing I have done all day (they could be cut off from a major supply of bagpipes and kilts)

"The official ballot is one line: 'Should Scotland be an independent country?' And that's it. Why is it that I have to go through 18 pages of terms and conditions to download iOS 8 while a whole country can secede from the United Kingdom by checking a box that says 'Yes'?" –Jimmy Kimmel

"The people of Scotland are voting on whether to declare independence from the United Kingdom. If Scotland votes for Independence, it could have major ramifications. Great Britain is concerned that if they lose Scotland, they could be cut off from a major supply of bagpipes and kilts." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Game of Thrones" had a good night. Won best drama, set the record for most Emmys won by a series ever, 38 Emmys. A bunch of the actors from "Game of Thrones" came to our party last night. I have to admit I got a little nervous. On "Game of Thrones," when they have a party, people have a tendency to die violently. –Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”