"Ron Paul's campaign is upset because during last week's Republican presidential debate, he only got to speak for 89 seconds. Meanwhile, Rick Perry's campaign is upset because during last week's debate, he got to speak." –Conan O'Brien
"Herman Cain also says that he's in favor of waterboarding — as long as it is consensual." –David Letterman
"People are still talking about Rick Perry's memory lapse. And it happened a couple of months ago too, when he had trouble remembering the name of his hunting camp." –David Letterman
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