Nobody on the Titanic was complaining about icebergs when they left the harbor (Become the squirrel)

May 2022

“Right-wing politicians and television networks responded to the news of the leak of a draft Supreme Court ruling overturning Roe v. Wade this week by focusing not on the content of the leak, but on revealing the identity of the leaker. How will they ever recover from this breach of their personal privacy? Maybe Samuel Alito can start wearing a shirt that says, ‘My judicial body, my choice.’” —Seth Meyers

“And how do you know it’s a liberal? It could have just as easily been a conservative — [coughs] Ginni Thomas [coughs] — who leaked the opinion to freeze the majority in place and stop the chief justice, John Roberts, from trying to convince one of the other court’s conservatives to soften their stance. I have no idea, but the fact that they’re all freaking out about the leak instead of celebrating the victory is telling. It underscores yet again that even at the height of their powers, these people always have to play the victim. If they won a free car on ‘Wheel of Fortune,’ they’d immediately start whining: ‘But I already have two cars in my garage — I don’t have space for a brand-new Stingray. This is so unfair!’” —Seth Meyers

“Yes, a left-wing Antifa law clerk trying to sabotage the court, or a right-wing MAGA head trying to lock the decision in place. Or maybe it was the butler. It’s always the butler.” —Trevor Noah

“Many people are horrified, not that women and half the country would lose their rights over their own bodies, but rather that this information got leaked. Which is weird. It’s like running around the deck of the Titanic trying to find out who yelled ‘We’re sinking!’ instead of focusing on the iceberg.” —Trevor Noah

“But while everyone on regular cable channels was playing the least horny version of Knives Out, Newsmax had already cracked the case by blaming, with zero evidence, recently appointed justice Ketanji Brown Jackson. Look at you, using the tried and true investigative technique of ‘The black person did it!’” —Trevor Noah

“As usual, Fox News was committed to not reporting the news, and instead reporting spin that the leaked draft was somehow a win for Democrats. To quote former Trump adviser and Fox News pundit Kellyanne Conway: ‘It’s very curious to me that the Democrats weren’t talking about it until today.’ Typically people wait until something happens to talk about it. Nobody on the Titanic was complaining about icebergs when they left the harbor.” —Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Look, if the founders wanted women to have credit cards, they would have said so (a reverse Uno card)

May 2022

“That’s right, it looks like the Supreme Court will overturn Roe v. Wade. Apparently, they decided masks aren’t mandatory, but Mother’s Day is.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Yeah, that means all across the country, women in places like South Dakota or Missouri or even Texas will have the exact same abortion rights as women in Afghanistan under the Taliban. Yeah, and just think about that: We just evacuated people out of Afghanistan, and now we’re going to have to evacuate them out of Tennessee?” —Trevor Noah

“Most people thought the freedom to choose was just how America was. No one ever thought the G.O.P. could roll it back by playing a reverse Uno card.” —Trevor Noah

“For perspective, consider this: It wasn’t until the year after Roe v. Wade that women in America got the legal right to have a credit card without a man. Think about that. Yeah. And I think we would all agree it would be a little weird if the court was suddenly like, ‘Look, if the founders wanted women to have credit cards, they would have said so. They would have.’” —Trevor Noah

“Today, Chief Justice John Roberts condemned the leak and announced that there will be an investigation into how it got out. Americans are like, ‘Uh, the leak is not our main concern.’” —Jimmy Fallon

“The conservative majority on the court has a fundamental right to choose when they want to release a decision into the world. Imagine having some random person violate your privacy and make that choice for you. Who would do such a thing?” —Trevor Noah

“It’s crazy how conservatives always manage to make themselves the victim in any situation. I mean, they have just accomplished this thing that they’ve been working toward for 50 years, and their first reaction is ‘It’s so unfair what’s happening to us!’ I’m sorry, what, you wanted your ruling to be a big surprise and now someone ruined it?” —Trevor Noah

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”