It's not you, it's I-95 (a body has already washed up onshore)

According to a new study, men who live near heavily used roads are more likely to have trouble achieving an erection due to pollution exposure. Said one man, "It's not you, it's I-95." --Seth Meyers

Officials have announced that Manhattan will be getting its first public beach in 2022. And even though it's three years away, a body has already washed up onshore. --Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”