I’ll show you Pelosi, I’ll impeach myself! (Aw, but that's what made it exciting!)

House speaker Nancy Pelosi is making headlines after telling reporters that she is not in favor of impeaching President Trump because, “He’s just not worth it.” Not worth it? What does that mean? I’m sorry. Is she saving impeachment for a second president we don’t know about? At the same time, Pelosi told reporters that she believes Trump is “intellectually unfit” for office. I’ve heard of “too big to fail” but this is the first time I’ve heard “Too dumb to impeach.” Now, I think I know what this is - this is clearly Nancy Pelosi’s attempt at reverse psychology. She’s hoping Trump is going to be like, “Not worth impeachment? Wrong! I’ll show you Pelosi, I’ll impeach myself!” --James Corden

A park in Pennsylvania is closing one of its roads on rainy nights for the next month so that amphibians, like frogs and salamanders, can mate without threat from passing cars. Said one frog, "Aw, but that's what made it exciting!" --Seth Meyers

According to a new study on sleep habits, people who identify as early risers have more sex than those who identify as night owls. Yeah, that is what they mean by the early bird gets the worm. I get it now. --James Corden

And finally, the news from my homeland. A burglar in London recently attempted to sneak into a building through the backyard area and ended up disturbing the owners beehive and the burglar was then chased away by a swarm of 80,000 angry bees. It sounds like this guy was the victim of a sting operation. --James Corden

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”