they can't accept a petition that was written on a crumpled up Funyuns bag (so he went as himself from 2008)

November 2011

"The White House announced that it has rejected several petitions to legalize marijuana. They say it has nothing to do with politics. It's just that they can't accept a petition that was written on a crumpled up Funyuns bag." –Jimmy Fallon

"President Obama gave candy to trick-or-treaters at the White House. Obama wanted people to like his costume, so he went as himself from 2008." –Jimmy Fallon

"A school in China is being fined because children are too loud on its playground. Yeah, their teachers are like, 'You kids are way too loud. Now hurry up and finish building this playground.'" –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”