Make sure to separate your sex bed from your sex bottles and your sex cans (it was wrong to make tonsil hockey an Olympic sport)

July 2021

“The Olympics organizers are doing everything they can to prevent the spread of Covid, as rumors circulated that the International Olympic Committee outfitted the Olympic Village with ‘anti-sex’ beds designed to collapse under the weight of more than one person. Yes, because we know if there is one thing world-class athletes can’t do, it’s have sex in unusual positions.” —Stephen Colbert

“And athletes, remember: If you’re recycling, you’ve got to break down your Olympic sex bed. Make sure to separate your sex bed from your sex bottles and your sex cans.” —Stephen Colbert

“I can’t wait for six months from now to read toilet paper labels that read ‘Made from 100 percent recycled Olympic sex bed.’” —Stephen Colbert

“The virus has also threatened the Olympics on the eve of their kick-off in Tokyo; on Monday, the number of Covid cases linked to the Olympics rose to 61. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: it was wrong to make tonsil hockey an Olympic sport. At this rate there’s not going to be any healthy humans left to compete in the Games.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”