idiocracy23: That’s right, it’s just another case of “she said, he paid.” (Snoop, that’s a mop)

The Taj Mahal is currently undergoing its first cleaning since its construction

in the 1600s. “Maybe we should do that,” said New York. --Seth Meyers

Rum maker Bacardi announced yesterday that it is acquiring Patron Spirits

for $5.1 billion. And like most Bacardi announcements, it was shouted at

5 a.m. in the back seat of an Uber. --Seth Meyers

Vice President Mike Pence today called reports claiming that President

Trump had an affair with an adult film star nothing more than “baseless

allegations.” That’s right, it’s just another case of “she said, he paid.”

--Seth Meyers

The butter substitute “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” is reportedly changing

its iconic name. From now on it’ll be called “I Can’t Believe Donald Trump

Is President.” –Seth Meyers

Rapper Snoop Dogg recently revealed that country music singer Willie

Nelson is the only person who can “out-smoke” him. And then someone

said, “Snoop, that’s a mop.” –Seth Meyers

#1001Ways #RandomThoughts #poetry

idiocracy23