I guess it was a good decision to increase his allowance (we'll get it in through the backdoor)

It's been reported that Ashton Kutcher has given Demi Moore an emerald and diamond bracelet worth $300,000. Afterwards Demi Moore said, “I guess it was a good decision to increase his allowance.” --Conan O’Brien 3/31/2005

This is an interesting statistic. 56% of women say they are more affectionate with their pets than they are with their partners. Which explains why Paris Hilton's dog has to get so many shots. --Conan O’Brien 3/31/2005

Earlier today Republicans in the Senate failed to get enough votes to pass an amendment banning gay marriage. Afterwards Republicans said we're not giving up. If we can't Ram it down their throats we'll get it in through the backdoor. --Conan O’Brien 7/14/2004

Ken Jennings became the first person ever to win 1 million dollars on Jeopardy. He’s like a machine. You can tell that he's getting cocky because whenever he hears the name Alex Trebek he answers, “Who's my bitch?” --Conan O’Brien 7/14/2004

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”