President Trump claimed that he scored higher on his cognitive test than all his predecessors. His psychological test could use a little work, though [shows three Rorschach images]: “Hillary Clinton in prison… Hillary Clinton in prison… A butterfly talking to Hillary Clinton in prison.” --Seth Meyers
Today is National Winnie the Pooh Day, which is why I’m not wearing any pants. --Seth Meyers
A funeral home in Canada is reportedly under investigation after they cremated the wrong woman’s body. Even after she told them, “Stop! I’m the wrong woman!” --Seth Meyers
Zac Efron will play serial killer Ted Bundy in an upcoming movie. Even weirder, the movie is “High School Musical 4.” --Seth Meyers
A magisterial collection.
An emotional roller coaster.
Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s
Last Night On Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.

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