Cheney said he felt terrible about shooting a 78-year-old man (gay cowboy movie)

"Last night I went out with a bunch of the guys and played the 'Dick Cheney Drinking Game', it's when you down a beer and then you take a shot at good old granddad." --Jay Leno

"Monday is President's Day and former President Bill Clinton is very excited. He is taking George Bush, Sr. to 'Hooters'. George H.W. Bush and Bill Clinton have been spending more and more time together. Doesn't that seem like an unusual couple to you, honestly? Earlier today they went to go see that gay cowboy movie." --David Letterman

"Dick Cheney said he felt terrible about shooting a 78-year-old man, but on the bright side, it did give him a great idea about how to fix Social Security." --Bill Maher