No wonder they're poisoning our toys (Cheney's egg-laying season)

"We all know Karl Rove resigned yesterday. Big blow to the White House. Rumsfeld's gone, Wolfowitz, Harriet Miers, Dan Bartlett -- all gone. Cheney -- never much help during the summer. That's his egg-laying season." --Jon Stewart

"But have no fear, help is on the way for this administration. Condoleezza? [on screen: Sec/State Condoleezza Rice naming Cal Ripken Jr. as Special Sports Envoy to the State Dept.] This is an unusual situation, one we will examine in a segment we're calling 'Rice & Ripken: Together at ... Why?! I guess it's kind of a cool idea. You send Ripken to some baseball-mad country like the Dominican Republic or Venezuela [on screen: Ripken saying, 'I can't wait to get to China to see how baseball is received']. China? So to get China to like us we're going to send a guy they've probably never heard of to crush them in a sport they've never played? No wonder they're poisoning our toys." --Jon Stewart

     

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