"And as you know, the McCain campaign is
running that commercial where they're comparing Barack Obama to various
Hollywood celebrities. And as you know, if there's one thing the Republicans
will not stand for, it's electing some Hollywood celebrity to public office.
Except for Ronald Reagan, Fred Thompson, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Clint Eastwood
-- you know, except for those." --Jay Leno
"President Bush is on the
hunt for a new home. He just found out he and Laura are going to have to move
out of the White House in a few months. His massive plan of foreclosures and
plummeting real estate prices finally paid off." --Jimmy Kimmel
"And earlier this week, John McCain had a
small mole moved from his temple. To which President Bush said, 'Temple? I
didn't know he was Jewish!'" --Jay Leno
