New Hampshire changed its state slogan to 'Please Shoot Me.'

"Did you folks see the debates in New Hampshire over the weekend? Oh my god, dull. I mean, they were so dull that today, and it was official, I saw it in the paper, New Hampshire changed its state slogan from 'Live Free or Die' to 'Please Shoot Me.'" --David Letterman

 "And on the Republican side, congratulations to John McCain. He was a big winner up in New Hampshire, too. Fascinating comeback story, this John McCain, quite a guy. Highly decorated veteran. Spent 5 1/2 years in prison then went into politics. Usually it's the other way around." --Jay Leno

"This year, the immigration and naturalization service has raised their fee to become a U.S. citizen. How much do you think it costs to become a U.S. citizen? It's about $700. It now costs $700 to become a U.S. citizen. In fact, you know how much immigration and naturalization expects to make this year on people becoming U.S. citizens? Over $1,400" --Jay Leno